Posted by: Joe Palmer | January 20, 2010

Transforming Relationships: LOVE: Nothing Else Matters

Transforming Relationships:

LOVE: Nothing Else Matters

Jack had just gotten back from a date with the girl of his dreams. His friend Tom asked him how it went. “Great,” said Jack, “She was so beautiful, and so sweet, and after dinner we drove down to the lake. The moon was beautiful and the stars. She said to me, ‘Jack if you put the top down on this car I’ll give you a kiss.” “What did you do?” Tom asked. “I had the top down on that car in seven minutes flat,” said Jack. Tom said, “Jack, I can put my top down in 30 seconds.” Jack said, “Yea I know, but you drive a convertible.”

Love is the greatest motivational source of all. But why do we get into a relationship? There are at least three reasons:

  1. What’s in it for me – Perhaps it’s money, status, or even sexual gratification. Some relationships are formed for purely self-interest.
  2. My own insecurity – Fear of being alone, financial insecurity, and low self-esteem can cause us to settle for a relationship that’s not right, or rush into one that isn’t healthy.
  3. Ulterior Motives – Pregnancy, family expectations, trying to get out of a bad relationship, and unplanned pregnancy are a few ulterior motives.

All of these are short-term motivations and relationships are designed for the long haul. No wonder so many people end up breaking up. They never had a foundation to begin with.

  • If we are looking out for self then what do we do when a richer, sexier, or better connected partner comes along?
  • If we got into a relationship out of insecurity, we will remain insecure within the relationship and that can cause lots of problems.
  • If we had some ulterior motive, then we begin to second guess why we did something that we knew wasn’t right.

How do we fix it? First of all understand there is hope. Love is a decision, not an emotion. You can learn to love, and repair a broken relationship. I Corinthians 13:1-3 teaches us that in relationships, “Nothing Else Matters.” Love is the key.

  • Words don’t matter – Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. I Cor. 13:1. Flowery words, poems, even a love song can’t replace love.
  • Knowledge doesn’t matter – And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. I Cor. 13:2 Abilities, knowledge, these are small things compared to love. “Knowledge puffs up, but love edifies.” I Cor. 8:1 Wow, how true, sometimes our knowledge and arrogance actually hurts our relationship.
  • Even actions don’t matter – And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing. I Cor. 13:3 It is incredible to think that even actions don’t matter, but it’s true. You can do many things, buying expensive gifts, cars, or even a home. However, without love… NOTHING ELSE MATTERS. On the opposite side when you suffer sickness, adversity, and financial losses, if you have love, NOTHING ELSE MATTERS.

Joe Palmer


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